Richie Valens
Donna




I had girl, Donna was her name
Since she left me, I’ve never been the same
‘Cause I love my girl, Donna where can you be
Where can you be

Now that your gone, I’m left all alone
All by myself, to wonder and groan
‘Cause I love my girl, Donna where can you be
Where can you be

Well darling now that your gone
I don’t know what I’ll do
Oh time had all my love, for you

I had girl, Donna was her name
Since she left me, I’ve never been the same
‘Cause I love my girl, Donna where can you be
Where can you be
Oh Donna, oh Donna, oh Donna, oh Donna.....



this song was in the 50s...great song...


still remember her wanting me to sing this song to her...haha...i said dun wan cause the lyrics were not appropriate....but maybe now it is....


aiyo...stupid seyy this hp...spoil....argghhh.....goddammit....repair costs about 400 bucks!!!woo....mite as well buy new phone kann....screw u....


its not the same this wayy

i dunnoe what should i do seyy....caught in between two minds...i'm afraid of any decisions dat i hav to make about this....it is all full of what ifs and fear of regrets..need to talk to her...badly...but this time round i need her to really conversate with me...i dun wan dunnoes and single word reply....if not i will never really noe what's happenning...yea..i admit i made a harsh decision and everything happenned just to fast...

but it all succumbed to because of the anxiety and unsureness of what's goin on..seriously...i really thought she had enuf of me...done with it and wanna leave me there...that was partly the factor of my decision....but i was wrong..dammit...why are things so unclear now.... i wanna talk to her but dunnoe what should i say first and how...i also dunnoe if i should meet you to talk cause the way she talked the last time we met,it was heartbreaking...it seemed like she didn't care....



this is all my thoughts and whoever thinks that im discriminating people well thats your problem...

heyyss....well nuthin much happened today....met nick to go to gym...yea...had a real workout jus now...and i think i sprained my stupid shoulder doin the benchpress thingy....but ok...not that painful...


heard about a school alumini meeting on friday....its been goin on all around....ironically...this friday is 1st of april...april fools day...yea...skali kana con die sia....


dunnoe hu's goin tho...well if i got nuthin to do then maybe i goin...yea....


yesterday nite before loggin off,was over the moon...in fact quite shocked tho by what happenned...its nice to noe she still loves me...but still need some time to think about it first....dun wanna be impulsive...so hold on to ya pants aiite...ya'll hear from me soon...

oh yea....so how's my pleasant language now huh?no more fs no more vulgarities....let me show u the beauty of my language....startin today...lets hope it can last long..hahah


been listening to an ol' hit by oasis..wonderwall and learnt to play the whole song today...brilliant song...whilst playin...i daydreamt...daydreamt of one day performing on stage in front of a crowd...don't have to be a huge crowd...yeaa...dat would be my dream...it has been since i was a child...dats why i'm formin a band...have formed one tho...althou no drummer yet...nick stuupid never learn..haha..no offence...we only had one session last week and gonna have another this week hopefully....gonna kickstart again and have regular and long sessions together....



damn glad of what u said to me yesterday...

heyyss....well nuthin much happened today....met nick to go to gym...yea...had a real workout jus now...and i think i sprained my stupid shoulder doin the benchpress thingy....but ok...not that painful...


heard about a school alumini meeting on friday....its been goin on all around....ironically...this friday is 1st of april...april fools day...yea...skali kana con die sia....


dunnoe hu's goin tho...well if i got nuthin to do then maybe i goin...yea....


yesterday nite before loggin off,was over the moon...in fact quite shocked tho by what happenned...its nice to noe she still loves me...but still need some time to think about it first....dun wanna be impulsive...so hold on to ya pants aiite...ya'll hear from me soon...

oh yea....so how's my pleasant language now huh?no more fs no more vulgarities....let me show u the beauty of my language....startin today...lets hope it can last long..hahah

something's missing...i dunnoe wat....could be anythin.....went out to cut my hair jus now...yea...alone...cut it short....had second thoughts about it tho before cuttin...


now damned bored...online...no one to talk to...think that's what've been missing...


misery sia....i shall not use the word f today....

no matter what i do i can't stop thinkin of how things was way back....how we were in class...jokin...teasing each other...

then we started talkin on the fon....everynight...we were both bored so we entertained each other...had endless conversation...that's why i jus can't take it about what happenned recently...

i was the one she talked to...always...for close to 5 months maybe more....she was my bestest of all best friends....really...now i've lost my best friend....lost someone to hold onto...to talk to..to spend time to...


but nvm...i dun wan your pityness....pityness can be more hurtful....you changed my life..for the better...wanna thank her for that...stilll lovin you...chiao



well nurul...no fs in this entry...

those years of friendship ended just like this....it could've been our 4 months together in about 7 hours if it didn't end....

fuck....dunnoe why she had to go...fuck sia...all because of one thing and it was our first arguement...like damn fuckin foolish noe....fuckin hell....and if i think the anonymous is who i think is,you got guts type your fuckin name ya fuckface...dun go around taggin people's blog and insulting em....fuck u laa knn....cheebye....if u dun have the balls or the tits...den go fuck a dog

ehh first and for most...how the fuck am i suppose to get my fuckin facts rite when u dun say a fuckin thing....ehh...its not that i wanna be this way...but i can't seem to get any info from u...i still remember the time when i ask u anything u said dunnoe dunnoe dunnoe...how the hell im suppose to work on that????if it was maybe or think so den its a diff story...ehh...i've got nothin against your fren laa ok...ehh...u think im dat kind of person hu discriminate people and lovin it...you think i enjoy it...u wanna noe something...this is the only place where i can vent all my anger and let my feelings out...u wanna noe how hard it was to for me to tell myself to calm down...i was left in the dark for way too long...


i didn't say i wann u to break up your relationship with your fren...i jus wan u to treat me rite...if u can juggle your frens with me last time why can't you do the same with her...i didn't even say that i dun wan u to talk to her...ehh perna tak i say to stop chatting with her when i talk to you...no rite...perna tak i jus hang up on u...never kann...i still remember sia u the time u say we could last long...wateva happenned to that...everyday i tell myself when there's a will there's a way...


you noe...all my friends...i mean all whom i spoke to ask me to either break up with u or ask u to stop talkin to her...i told em...i'm not selfish sia...to her i'm nothin...i dun wanna be person who chooses who my girlfriend makes friend with....but if only she treats me rite...i'm nt askin much rite...jus make me feel wanted....u can chat with her all nite...i'm fine with it... i can talk to you before that or when she has to do opening...i've tried all methods to not let you go but u seem reluctant and pessimistic...


u noe how sad it is or not??to let go jus like this....i never meant to say all thos words about your friend or you...but i can't help it anymore...my heart is beyond repair sia...




sorry if i've wasted 4 months of your life....its 4 months that'll you will never get back..and also for all the money you've spent on me..on stuff u bought,hp bills etc....sorry if i've said things that aren't supposed to be said about you and your friends...wished u understand how i feel rite now...jus pretend i was never here and never was in your life k?...i dun wanna history to repeat itself...pieces of trash like me shouldn't have interfered with your life...maybe i dun deserve to be any where near you....well i won't interfere with your life anymore....thanks for everything...

sup...


well got a respond from her yesterday...said she was sorry...well miss....sorry dun solve nuthin....i can accept your apology but only if u do something about this....this fuckin thing cannot be left unnoticed...was feelin so fucked up yesterday....she still insist that tat butch is a friend...ya..ok....now lemme ask u guys....do u get excited when u see ure friend??do u from plaza sing walk all the way to orchard building jus to go pee...in the mean time get to see your friend...jus see only u noe...and say hi...do u guys do tat???i noe i dun...not if i like that person more than a friend...and err...do u wait for your friend for 2 hours to go online in the wee hours of the night??chat until 7am??maybe some of u do dat...not me..not even to ma gurl....do u chat to ure friend online on net tat u dun bother to talk to the other person on the fon who called her earlier on....leave that person like some fool...everytime when he or she says something u go...err wat?err ahh?.....


imagine all that and put me n her in the picture....think how fucked up can u feel....at first i tot i was jus over reacting budden her fren got pissed also talkin to her when she was chattin with tat "gerl" online....i've been as patient as i can for the past month...i never scold her or say anything cause i'm not that kind of person...i jus kept quite..but i guess keepin quite is not working...you dun even hav a fucking clue....well now lemme tell u...i hate the way u talk to her,look at her,your reaction when she sees her....but maybe in other words im jealous...and there you will go jealous of what...she's my fren....ya la...but the way u treat her and me is FUCKING DIFFERENT...ITS LIKE WE GOT EXCHANGED TREATMENT...i got hers and she got mine....u get what i mean....she's being treated like your bf and i get treated like some piece of trash...why sia u...dun tell me u dun noe this....now u dun even bother to give me a fuckin call or msg....not even say a fuckin hello or goodnight...u act as if i'm outta your life...

i still fuckin remember the card you send me on my birthday....it was the sweetest card i ever recieved and i jus read em yesterday night...now i'm beginning to feel it was crap...but maybe im wrong.for now i dun think so....if u think guys are all bastards well u ARE FUCKIN wrong...i'm not like em...i dun go around askin gerl number...if i dun cherish our relationship,we would go our separate ways a very looonnnggg time ago....don't you feel tat it will be wasted after our great friendship tat we had for almost 3 fuckin years...tats the longest time i ever known a gerl and then goin into a relationship wif her....i dun wanna let go tat easily but your not makin this easy...maybe its time for u to make sacrifices for us...but if its not worth it to u den jus tell me straight at my fuckin face...i dun wanna suffer all this shit for no cause...now this butch u jus noe for a few weeks and your treating her as if u knew her for 10 years...and me???jus a spectator....u dun even care if i dun fuckin call or fucking msg...and not even wait for my call but that butch...u wait for her to go online until you fall asleep...aww...how sweet....and now?you're even goin out with her...time and time again i told you to ask your friends follow..u say for wat...ehh....she's butch sia u...she has a mentality of a guy...so wat if u say she's shy...i'm shy too but any thing can happen..u jus noe her for a few weeks and u say she's great blah blah blah...i never not even once hear u say tat about me?am i tat bad....fuckk...ehh..if that gerl is fucking straight person i dun give damn sia...u wanna kiss,hold hands,share food,send her home? i dun care...cause she's straight..but now that fuckin butch is not sia....she's not straight...gerls attracts her...and u?u jus played along...u dun even tell her that you hav me....FUCK FUCK FUCK....jus tell her tat....dun fuckin tell me tat u dun wanna hurt her...what about me???if u dun tell her tat she still have a light of hope to be with you....its u who's givin her hope...come on sia u..please stop all this..i can't take this anymore...

wassupp.....my mind have been really full lately...fuck fuck fuck....she don't even give a damn about how i feel anymore...3 nights ago chilled with eug and akbo and frankly speakin it was kinda nice...we laid back gazing the stars and sang songs...it made me forget all my probz...she told me she's the kind tat won't break up a relationship even if she hates her guy...she will irate him until he cant tahan...weeelllll miss......for your info i'm beginning to feel tat ure doin it to me rite now...fuck u noe....how fucked up can u be...u leave me all alone down here guessing what i should do....fuck fuck fuck fuck....i dunnoe what to do cause i dunnoe whats rite n wats wrong...ehh..u noe how fuckin difficult it is...u noe fuckin noe or not?????!!!!!i dun think so....CAUSE ALL U CARE ABOUT IS THAT FUCKING BUTCH!BUTCH THIS BUTCH THAT...
.U KEEP ON INSISTING URE STRAIGHT...

HATE TO SAY THIS BUT YOUR NOT...FUCKK...
URE EVEN GOIN OUT WITH HER....I DUN EVEN HAV A SAY IN THIS....FUCKING HELL...
IF I EVER SEE THAT BUTCH I'M GONNA SMACK HER FUCKIN FACE MAN...
SO FUCKING WAT IF SHE'S IS HENSEM...N ICE GREAT...
SINCE SHE CAME INTO YOUR LIFE U FUCKIN DON CARE ABOUT ME...U FUCKIN PUT ME ASIDE...U FUCKIN PISS ME...ALL BECAUSE OF TAT BUTCH...
AND ERR WAT U ONCE SAY...U DUN WAN TO TELL HER U GOT A BF CAUSE U DUN WANNA HURT HER...WHAT ABOUT ME?????!!!!!!!!!!!!DUN TELL ME U AIN'T HURTING ME....U HURT ME UNTIL THERE'S NO MORE BLOOD TO BLED....

EVERYNIGHT I DON'T HAVE PEACEFUL DREAMS CAUSE I ALWAYS DREAM OF U WHICH WAN TO MAKE ME FUCKIN CHOKE....

EVENTHO I LOVE U BUT I FEEL LIKE A DAMN FUCKIN FOOL.....WASTIN MY FUCKIN TIME TO A PERSON WHO DONT GIVE A DAMN TO HER GUY BUT MORE TO TAT FUCKIN BUTCH...GO TO HER UHH...FUCKING HELL... IT'S DAMN SAD FOR ME TO SAY ALL OF THIS BUT ITS NOT AS BAD AS WHAT URE FUCKIN DOIN TO ME...WHAT HAPPEN TO THE GERL I NOE OF U LAST TIME....

I SWEAR TO GOD..IF I EVER SEE U TWO TOGETHER OUTSIDE BE IT AT WORK OR WHETHER U N I ARE OVER,SHE WILL GET TO KNOW ME IN A VERY PHYSICAL MANNER...FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!!!!FUCK ALL U BUTCHES...GOD DAMMN ALL OF U!!
ESP THOS OF U WHO GET IN OUR FUCKIN WAY...GET A COCK FIRST MANN...FUCKING HELL...GOD GIVE U A FUCKIN PUSSY TO BE A FUCKING GERL SO U CAN BE FUCKED ..GOD GIVE GUYS A FUCKIN COCK SO HE CAN FUCK...WELL U GOT IT ALL FUCKIN WRONG...U ACT LIKE A GUY THAT WANTS TO BE FUCK...WELL I CAN FUCK URE FUCKIN PUSSY..WITH A FUCKIN BASEBALL BAT... referrring to butches...so all of u gerls dun terase



sorry for the explicit language...goodbye have a nice day

yesterday first session of the band...wasn't really succesful...we were very rusty...yeaa...later went to chill and had a nice chat about gerls...yeaa....not gonna go in depth on tat...gtg...bye

nuthin much happen todayy....haiz....without u my life is a bore

we are taking a time off now...gosh....miss her so much....heyy... i dedicated this song to her...it really explains how i feel....almost exactly...hope you're readin....take care

Promise by matchbook romance

What would you say if I asked you not to go
To forget everyone, forget everything and start over with me
Would you take my hand and never let me go
Promise me you'll never let me go

And now the stars aren't out tonight,
But neither are we to look up at them
Why does hello feel like goodbye?
These memories can't replace,
These wishes I wished and dreams I chased
Take this broken heart and make it right

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
I thought you should know,
You're not making this easy

I never thought I'd be the one to say
Please don't, well please don't leave me

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
I thought you should know,
You're not making this easy

You're not making this easy (easy, easy, easy...)

Take my hand and never let me go,
Take my hand and never let me go,
Promise me...
You'll never let go
You'll never let go
You'll never let go
You'll never let go
Make this last forever

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like to have you here with me
I thought you should know, you're not making this easy

You're not making this easy
You're not making this easy
You're not making this easy
You're not making this easy

I'll fall asleep tonight, 'cause that brings me closer to you

really stressed now...so fucking bear with me...

You don't know how much I need you.
While you're near me I don't feel blue.
And when we kiss I know you need me too.
I can't believe I found a love that's so pure and true.
But it all was bullshit.
It was a goddam joke.
And when I think of you , I hope you fucking choke.
I hope you're glad with what you've done to me.
I lay in bed all day long feeling melancholy.
You left me here all alone, tears running constantly.
Oh somebody kill me please,
somebody kill me plee-ase,
I'm on my knees, pretty pretty please kill me.
I want to die.
Put a bullet in my head.



the story of our band begins once more...

fuck fuck fuck..i think i've come to a decision...if i stick with it,she will come to know of it soon...

hokai....i'm feelin much much much much better...yea....after havin a talk to her yesterday at bk i feel my head seems lighter...i'm able to talk much more...yea....love this feelin..hope tat was all a thing of the past...yea..i was rite all along..it was self-conflict...like a civil war...err..hahah...did i geddit rite there?well wat the hey....i'm back and im in business

guess eug is rite...i'm kinda emo...so wat fuck...who fuckin cares rite...i can be emo i can be crazziee i can be sad i can be sadistic i can be fucked up and nobody cares....they noe but they dun fuckin care...

i jus realised how long it has been since she said this thing to me....yea...when i asked her last night to say it she didn't understand...but nevermind...i shall ask her again today....really hope we will meet up...her job i think is takin its toll on her...i always ask her to quit but she refused cause of dunnoe wat particular reasons...dun wanna noe about it...i too dun fuckin care anymore cause she dun seem to fuckin care how i feel...if she didnt know why i didnt talk to her about the thing that day in the bus...the reason was because i missed her smile her laughter...the way she talked to me...and i didn't want that to go away that night and was afraid if i talked to her abt tat thing she might not smile again that night...and i dun wan that to happen....it makes me really happy to know tat i could make her smile and laugh once more..but is that jus to cover up all her sadness?please...talk to me about all this stuff...we really need to



sky is falling

guess eug is rite...i'm kinda emo...so wat fuck...who fuckin cares rite...i can be emo i can be crazziee i can be sad i can be sadistic i can be fucked up and nobody cares....they noe but they dun fuckin care...

i jus realised how long it has been since she said this thing to me....yea...when i asked her last night to say it she didn't understand...but nevermind...i shall ask her again today....really hope we will meet up...her job i think is takin its toll on her...i always ask her to quit but she refused cause of dunnoe wat particular reasons...dun wanna noe about it...i too dun fuckin care anymore cause she dun seem to fuckin care how i feel...if she didnt know why i didnt talk to her about the thing that day in the bus...the reason was because i missed her smile her laughter...the way she talked to me...and i didn't want that to go away that night and was afraid if i talked to her abt tat thing she might not smile again that night...and i dun wan that to happen....it makes me really happy to know tat i could make her smile and laugh once more..but is that jus to cover up all her sadness?please...talk to me about all this stuff...we really need to



sky is falling

guess eug is rite...i'm kinda emo...so wat fuck...who fuckin cares rite...i can be emo i can be crazziee i can be sad i can be sadistic i can be fucked up and nobody cares....they noe but they dun fuckin care...

i jus realised how long it has been since she said this thing to me....yea...when i asked her last night to say it she didn't understand...but nevermind...i shall ask her again today....really hope we will meet up...her job i think is takin its toll on her...i always ask her to quit but she refused cause of dunnoe wat particular reasons...dun wanna noe about it...i too dun fuckin care anymore cause she dun seem to fuckin care how i feel...if she didnt know why i didnt talk to her about the thing that day in the bus...the reason was because i missed her smile her laughter...the way she talked to me...and i didn't want that to go away that night and was afraid if i talked to her abt tat thing she might not smile again that night...and i dun wan that to happen....it makes me really happy to know tat i could make her smile and laugh once more..but is that jus to cover up all her sadness?please...talk to me about all this stuff...we really need to



sky is falling

went to gym and then swimmin with eug n ram...was fun..now body tired...so yar...eug intro me to a few nice songs by lifehouse and one of em was really really nice.....it kinda a song tat is really meaningful and kinda wat i wanna say to her..most of the lyrics uh...so here they are....


Everything
By Lifehouse



Find me here,speak to me
I want to feel you, I need to hear you
You are the light that's leading me to the place
Where I find peace again
You are the strength that keeps me walking
You are the hope that keeps me trusting
You are the light to my soul
You are my purpose
You're everything
And how can I stand here with you
And not be moved by you
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this
You calm the storms and you give me rest
You hold me in your hands
You won't let me fall
You still my heart, and you take my breath away
Would you take me in take me deeper now
And how can I stand here with you And not be moved by you
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this
And how can I stand here with you And not be moved by you
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this
Cause you're all I want,
You're all I need
You're everything.. everything
You're all I want
You're all I need
You're everything.. everything
You're all I want
You're all I need
You're everything.. everything
You're all I want
You're all I need
Everything.. everything
And how can I stand here with you And not be moved by you
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this
And how can I stand here with you And not be moved by you
Would you tell me how could it be any better any better than this
And how can I stand here with you And not be moved by you
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this

hope she's readin this

heyy....a brand new week and i hope no brand new problems....today's plan would be visit the gym once more..yea....its gonna be gym gym gym gym gym gym gym....nuthin else...since she is workin...fuck man....her boss is fuckin outta her mind let her work one whole week without leave last week and this week only one day off which she intends to work due to the double pay she will recieve by doin so...i dunno should i be happy for her or sad for myself..well..lets keep it discreet...yesterday night after her work went to meet her in the bus....my intention was to talk to her regardin about a problem...but when i stepped into the bus went up the staircase and saw her face i shivered...i was nervous...and especially when i saw her smile once more somethin told me everythings gonna be alright...so i didn't talk to her regardin bout the problem....then when i came back...i realised that she behaved in a way nuthin happened...i was puzzled myself too.....then i t strucked me...what if all along it was self-conflict...a conflict that i made up of my own and a conflict i had with me and myself.....maybe i'm the one that inflicted that conflict and wanted her to be involved.....


that's the thing now....i jus dunnoe what's goin on...well...hope things doesn't get any worst because i was over the moon when i got to see her again yesterday nite...all the stress and problems were forgotten...its like i was in a world of my own with her....it was heavenly...

ahhh......sucky weekend once more....it will never be great weekend or ok weekend until i get something of my head...its been botherin me for days...dunnoe where i'm headin in my life...its been awhile since i met her,gosh...how badly i missed her...sometimes i think maybe we can never be like last time...well if we can't at least we can work on what we have now and hold on to it firmly rite?well it takes two to tango...if one doesn't wan to then things can never follow as planned...well maybe i'm damned on this earth...hu knows...

after thinkin real hard about what to do with the thing tt has been fuckin botherin me,i've decided to do something about it...jus like wat friend of mine told me to do..thanks eh...those words of yours really struck me in the head and made me wake up...its about time i set things straight and tell her wat i'm unhappy about and wat we can do...but i dunnoe wat to say...i'm afraid tat wat i might say may not be wat i meant...you noe wat i mean rite...

but i seriously think that i should change the way things go between us....i also think tat i'm being too soft and rather takin a step back too much....maybe tats why she dun seem to appreciate me tat much...this is wat i think...if im wrong than tats wonderful....

but it all falls down to the both of us...whether we're willing to compromise....like they say it takes two to tango....

now the thing is when should i talk to her about this...should i give her time to think or should i talk to her asap...both has it cons....if i give her time,she might drift further away...and if i talk to her asap,she may think that i'm jus paranoid and might get pissed at me again once more...i really duno wat the fuck i should do...wat the fuck is wrong with u...wat the fuck is wrong with me....wat the fuck is goin on...i've been kept in the fuckin dark way too fuckin long....

i'm still patient tho'...i will never do things to her tat shouldn't be done...so if u wanna avoid me..do as u please cause i will wait...wait until i die...

ahhh......sucky weekend once more....it will never be great weekend or ok weekend until i get something of my head...its been botherin me for days...dunnoe where i'm headin in my life...its been awhile since i met her,gosh...how badly i missed her...sometimes i think maybe we can never be like last time...well if we can't at least we can work on what we have now and hold on to it firmly rite?well it takes two to tango...if one doesn't wan to then things can never follow as planned...well maybe i'm damned on this earth...hu knows...

after thinkin real hard about what to do with the thing tt has been fuckin botherin me,i've decided to do something about it...jus like wat friend of mine told me to do..thanks eh...those words of yours really struck me in the head and made me wake up...its about time i set things straight and tell her wat i'm unhappy about and wat we can do...but i dunnoe wat to say...i'm afraid tat wat i might say may not be wat i meant...you noe wat i mean rite...

but i seriously think that i should change the way things go between us....i also think tat i'm being too soft and rather takin a step back too much....maybe tats why she dun seem to appreciate me tat much...this is wat i think...if im wrong than tats wonderful....

but it all falls down to the both of us...whether we're willing to compromise....like they say it takes two to tango....

now the thing is when should i talk to her about this...should i give her time to think or should i talk to her asap...both has it cons....if i give her time,she might drift further away...and if i talk to her asap,she may think that i'm jus paranoid and might get pissed at me again once more...i really duno wat the fuck i should do...wat the fuck is wrong with u...wat the fuck is wrong with me....wat the fuck is goin on...i've been kept in the fuckin dark way too fuckin long....

i'm still patient tho'...i will never do things to her tat shouldn't be done...so if u wanna avoid me..do as u please cause i will wait...wait until i die...

ahhh......sucky weekend once more....it will never be great weekend or ok weekend until i get something of my head...its been botherin me for days...dunnoe where i'm headin in my life...its been awhile since i met her,gosh...how badly i missed her...sometimes i think maybe we can never be like last time...well if we can't at least we can work on what we have now and hold on to it firmly rite?well it takes two to tango...if one doesn't wan to then things can never follow as planned...well maybe i'm damned on this earth...hu knows...

after thinkin real hard about what to do with the thing tt has been fuckin botherin me,i've decided to do something about it...jus like wat friend of mine told me to do..thanks eh...those words of yours really struck me in the head and made me wake up...its about time i set things straight and tell her wat i'm unhappy about and wat we can do...but i dunnoe wat to say...i'm afraid tat wat i might say may not be wat i meant...you noe wat i mean rite...

but i seriously think that i should change the way things go between us....i also think tat i'm being too soft and rather takin a step back too much....maybe tats why she dun seem to appreciate me tat much...this is wat i think...if im wrong than tats wonderful....

but it all falls down to the both of us...whether we're willing to compromise....like they say it takes two to tango....

now the thing is when should i talk to her about this...should i give her time to think or should i talk to her asap...both has it cons....if i give her time,she might drift further away...and if i talk to her asap,she may think that i'm jus paranoid and might get pissed at me again once more...i really duno wat the fuck i should do...wat the fuck is wrong with u...wat the fuck is wrong with me....wat the fuck is goin on...i've been kept in the fuckin dark way too fuckin long....

i'm still patient tho'...i will never do things to her tat shouldn't be done...so if u wanna avoid me..do as u please cause i will wait...wait until i die...

ahhh......sucky weekend once more....it will never be great weekend or ok weekend until i get something of my head...its been botherin me for days...dunnoe where i'm headin in my life...its been awhile since i met her,gosh...how badly i missed her...sometimes i think maybe we can never be like last time...well if we can't at least we can work on what we have now and hold on to it firmly rite?well it takes two to tango...if one doesn't wan to then things can never follow as planned...well maybe i'm damned on this earth...hu knows...

after thinkin real hard about what to do with the thing tt has been fuckin botherin me,i've decided to do something about it...jus like wat friend of mine told me to do..thanks eh...those words of yours really struck me in the head and made me wake up...its about time i set things straight and tell her wat i'm unhappy about and wat we can do...but i dunnoe wat to say...i'm afraid tat wat i might say may not be wat i meant...you noe wat i mean rite...

but i seriously think that i should change the way things go between us....i also think tat i'm being too soft and rather takin a step back too much....maybe tats why she dun seem to appreciate me tat much...this is wat i think...if im wrong than tats wonderful....

but it all falls down to the both of us...whether we're willing to compromise....like they say it takes two to tango....

now the thing is when should i talk to her about this...should i give her time to think or should i talk to her asap...both has it cons....if i give her time,she might drift further away...and if i talk to her asap,she may think that i'm jus paranoid and might get pissed at me again once more...i really duno wat the fuck i should do...wat the fuck is wrong with u...wat the fuck is wrong with me....wat the fuck is goin on...i've been kept in the fuckin dark way too fuckin long....

i'm still patient tho'...i will never do things to her tat shouldn't be done...so if u wanna avoid me..do as u please cause i will wait...wait until i die...

heyy..sorry i didn't update...was caught up with stuff and tons of problems tat i created.....fuck....i jus dunnoe what the fuck is happenin to me....my week has jus been so fucked up...no fuckin friend to turn to....she's busy with work work work..... i really really miss her man....miss the way we used to talk...the way we used to walk...the way we used to kiss....practically i jus miss u....the real u....people say everyone encounters changes...yea i agree..but if only i could turn back the time over and over again...its not tat i'm not happy with her now...i'm really happy jus to know tat i'm still hers and vice versa...the past few days had been havin sleepless nights....these nights seems like eternity....jus can't geddit outta my head....everytime i tell myself don't think too much,its ok...i still can't help it....i guess i'm paranoid....fuck....this is by far the most depressing week of my life...i dun smile a lot...i try too but some how in the end i feel like killing myself....yea...tats the word...sometimes when i dunnoe wat to do with the problem i feel like jus killing myself and its all over....cause when it comes to problems i'm not an ace....i can do things that ic an never forgive myself..like this prob i'm havin,those things i said to her came from my emotions not me...so i'm sorry again k?


everynight i wondered....what if one day i wake up knowin that both my legs were missin....then i told myself...tat is not as bad as waking up one day realising that she is no more part of my life...without my legs i can still be happy..but without her things can never be the same...she can say that i'm bullshittin or nuts...but this time i really mean wat i say....i never meant to hurt u...hurtin u i can never forgive myself...i jus get so jealous over things that can be considered stupid but she jus mean so much to me...i dun wanna let you go...


our conversations i dunnoe wats happenin to em....still remember those days when we use to talk till late at night and still feel fresh...but sometimes not....i really had fun....but know....i think i'm gettin dull and repetitive...i dun seem to make her laugh as much...smile as much....irritated as much..if she says i'm jus over the top over this little problem well be it....i believe to solve a problem you hav to explain your emotions...


i never wanted to show sour faces at her but i jus can't help it...sometimes the things she do or say to me really stab my heart...i still remember one day when we were in the bus...i dunnoe wat happen but everytime when i turned to look at you i feel like crying...i couldn't bare to look at her...i dunnoe why...what i need to know from her is what she is willin to do to savior this relationship or easy said does she still love me?sobs.....


well thats about it....if only she could read what's in my mind then she knows how i really feel...sometimes words can't express what i feel and instead givin a total different explanation....


To whom it may concern:don't take it so hard now...i'm sorry i can't be perfect but i'll give you my all...i promise you dat...all i wan in return is your love for me...that's all...i'd be over the moon...later in the near future we will see this again and we will laugh at how stupid and naive were we...so take care hav a good day always...i'll always be there by your side

wooot!!!!the suspected "dooms day" is over....and it turn out to be not so doomy after all...imma talkin abt o's la bodo...hahah...it was the most highly anticipated day of my life cause it will decide my fate in live...how i will live...how i live life....err....duno wtf imma talkin abt...well.niwaes....i'm suspecting that no one ever reads my blog..so err....why bother writing ya?hahah..bbyees